You Get In Life What You Ask For

Recently, a student reached out to me about an opportunity I had offered to him over a year ago. This student who is a dedicated Black Belt had shown incredible potential and was asked if he might like to assist our junior students. After some time to think about it, he reluctantly declined as he felt it didn’t seem like something he was comfortable with.

The reason I mention this story is this same student has stayed on the path and matured into an even stronger karate student today. Last week, I was blown away when he reached out to me about the previous offer, I had given him over a year ago. In his comments, he reflected on his martial arts journey and his newfound maturity, and how he might be able to offer his help in a better manner. I was really impressed with his courage in being able to bring up the topic many months later and approach the subject with a teacher/mentor.

After we chatted it was obvious that this kind of confidence was going to be a real positive for our students and I’m glad he had the courage to be able to bring up the subject again. However, after I thought about it this was no accident because this student had been doing this for many years at FCMA. Whether it was missing a class, vacation, or any other issue this student was always letting me know via voicemail, in person, or through email about anything that might affect his attendance. He had been set up by his parents to advocate for himself and it was clear it had benefitted him immensely, with his confidence and maturity for his age.

It's a necessary step to let kids do things on their own as parents but the even harder task is to let them try and fail. Sometimes as parents we are way too quick to jump in and correct to solve even the smallest of problems. I’m sure this student had been thinking about wanting to assist for some time, but I am also certain his parents likely told him to just talk to Sensei Chris. After a quick conversation, this student is now changing his course at First Choice Martial Arts and how it affects him is yet to be seen, but I know it’s going to make things a little better for him and the school.

Always remember, “You get in life what you have the courage to ask for.” Oprah Winfrey.